ARE YOU HAPPY? PART-1

Ask an old man or an old woman about their life. We hear them saying "Our days were much happier than these days". Even our parents keep saying that their youth days were happier. Even we feel that our childhood days are happier than the present days. Why?

Let us see the reasons.

Upto 1980:

In the olden days (my grand and fore father's generation), life used to be definite. I mean, defined. Lets see how.There used to be certain specific tasks assigned to each one of the family members. And they used to have routine cycle of tasks to be performed, with out any exceptions. Saturday and Sunday also were much alike the week days, because they did the same things on the weekends too. Each couple had a minimum of 4-5 children. As the population of the country was very less (compared to the current day), there were very few educated people who were doing jobs in Govt. sector. Private sector jobs, mostly were in a small scales. A typical day used to begin at 5 AM, when the hen calls. Ladies used to have their routine of cleaning the house and preparing coffee for the entire family. Gents used to perform their regular ablusions and routines, besides consuming coffee. There was not much anxiety or tension to get ready for their duties as the dressing was simple. Ladies never worked. So their job was to prepare breakfast and lunch, hence no tension in going out somewhere. Men walked or used cycles or bus to travel to their work places. Most of the people had home food all 365 days in the
year. They had food outside only when they went out of station. Hence there were very few hotels. Even if there were, there used to be a simple menu rather than a book consisting of 10 pages. As there were no automated machines like fridge, mixer, grinder, blender, washing machine, dough, micro wave oven, etc., women used to perform the daily activities like cleaning, washing, cooking manually. They enjoyed doing those tasks. Most of the families being joint, there used to be many married men and women residing in the same house. All the woman used to share the house hold work of the entire family. Men used to work and come back home in the evening, by which time, women used to complete their household works and start preparing supper. Income of the entire family used to be in hundreds of rupees. 1 thousand rupees was a very huge amount. 1 lakh was a dream. Number of cities were very less. There were only 4 major cities in the country. Sources of entertainment were limited to radio and newspaper, which consisted mostly of political news. There used to be a lot of holidays for men at work and the work timings used to be from 9 or 10 AM to 5 PM. Distant relatives communicated through postal mails. Telephone was a luxury. Hence communication was quite often, say once a month (postal delya's included). Festivals were typical. There used to be home made varities of food, all the people celebrating together, etc. The head of the family, usu the father, used to dictate or direct the entire family and all the members, without any doubts, followed his words. There used to be certian do's and do not's in the family. No waking up after 6 AM. No sleeping in the evenings. No eating on mattresses. No questioning the elders. Writing the balance sheet of the money transactions to the detail up to the least denomination. No breakfast before taking bath. No cooking without taking bath. No being awake after 10 PM. When women are in their menstrual period, they had to live separately in a place in the house for those 4 days and no body touched her,etc. There used to be such guidelines set by the head of the family, which every one followed blindly. There were several advantages in such a rule. All the family members get accustomed to a single type of life, hence no chaos. Since every one share the same treasury, they maintain a common ledger. Raising children was easy, since there was fear of elders for the children. Ladies got full rest during their periods. There were ofcourse, certain disadvantages. Since everyone heeded to the words of the head, their views were never raised, hence there were lot of differences of opinions. If the head of the family was unwise and not concerned, then the family had to suffer. But facts apart, people still believe that those were the happiest days in their lives.

1980 - 2000:

Generation 2 (My parents and uncle's generation). Life was certain. As the population grew, many joint families got split into nuclear families. Each individual nuclear family had their own house. Head of the entire nuclear dynasty still remained. But the decisions of individual lives were upto them. Each couple had 2-3 children. Government and private sectors increased. Machinary was developed. Chemical, electrical, mechanical and civil fields have shown significant changes in the society. Every house now has television, refrigerator, mixer grinder, telephone (land line), gas stove, oven, etc. Women hence got educated in colleges and they pursued their degrees. Number of women doing jobs increased. Hence rules changed. No strict formalities. Lives were customised according to their comforts, core rules being still followed. Family get togethers were limited to once per year. However, marriages and certain rituals were celebrated together. Differences in the lives of individual family units have increased, with their jobs and life styles. Income increased from hundreds to thousands of rupees. 1 lakh was tangible, but with difficulty. Cities have increased. Municipalities have increased. Communication increased with the telephones. Cinema industry was developed from 'Black and White' film to 'East Man Color' and 'Scope' films. Automobiles included mopeds, scooters, while cycles were still in use. Public transport included taxis apart from buses. Local trains in metros have increased their frequencies. People now had no restriction to wake up at 5 AM. They took their own time to relax (be it in the evening or during the day). Women also worked, hence the house hold work and cooking needed help. Servant maids were employed to take care of such works. Newspapers increased. Apart from politics, there were news about films, film stars, geography, history, stock market, etc. GDP has increased with the per capita income in the country. Many new businesses arrived. People started feeling to eat outside their homes, to have a different taste, once a while. Restaurants, theatres, petrol bunks, magazine sellers, cloth show rooms, consumer goods, etc. have increased. Life became more comfortable. People were happy, at the same time felt that they were missing something.

21st Century:

Generation X (Me, My friends and cousins). Life is uncertain. Population of the country has increased exponentially. Nuclear families have become more nuclear. No more government jobs. Only private sector jobs. This is the Electronics, Communication and Software Era. With the advent of software and the increased number of software companies, there are a lot of jobs (in lakhs) in the country. Men and women, all are educated. Engineering colleges, Medical colleges, Hospitals, Business schools, banks, etc. have increased a lot. Per capita income and the standard of living of the people have shown a great hike. Significant increase in the number of people going to the foreign countries like the USA, UK, the Gulf, Canada, Germany, Singapore, Malasia, etc. for pursuing their education or their job careers. Everything has become global. Communication now includes mobile phones, e-mails, internet messengers, etc. Automobiles have increased rapidly. Motor bikes for men and women, cars have increased a lot. Hence pollution increased. Public transport still is limited to buses and local trains in metro cities. Mobile phone has become a necessary commodity in the society. Home appliances now include washing machine, iron box, micro wave oven, Air Conditioner, Digital electronics like camera, handy cam, computers, laptop, etc. Men and women both go to their jobs. A couple in this generation plan to have only 1 child. Many new businesses have increased. People started eating outside as they are deprived of the time to cook at home. Children are raised at cretches. Cooking is only a special activity, usually at the weekends, or a once-a-week activity. Mother and father stay together (in most of the cases), but children go away to various places to pursue their careers. Nuclear families have split. Bakerys, Pizza deliverers, restaurants, ATMs, theatres, shopping malls, electronic shops, have increased a lot. Most of the transactions became online. Banking, bill payment, booking reservations in trains, flights, etc., booking tickets for a movie, etc. Income has increased a lot. People started earning in lakhs. 1 Crore is also becoming tangible. Media has shown a significant diversity. Many private channels have opened up in the Television and Radio. Many different newspapers and magazines have emerged. Cities have expanded and the number of cities is in hundreds. Public administration also changed, but the politics remain the same. People have everything today. Money, comforts, etc. but they feel bored. They are not happy. They are missing something. Why so?

Analysis:

If we observe the trend from the previous generations to the current generation, the life style, income, expenditure, comforts, have increased, showing a positive note. Also on the negative note are the increase in population, pollution, crime, corruption, worries, anxieties, fear, etc. Happiness, on the overall, has decreased. Contentment and satisfaction are no more there with the people. People are stuggling to compete with one another to earn more income. Constructing a house was a life time achievement in the yester years. People used to venture such an act at their 40's or 50's. Today a college passed out student, with an age of 20 years is worried about purchasing an apartment. 1 lakh rupees is a very meagre income. People are losing their happiness and are increasing their risks of ailments. Money earned today is being spent to cure the diseases obtained because of the struggle to earn that money. Stress levels have increased. Students are complaining about head aches, migrane, indigestion, ulcers, depression, nausea, insomnia, etc. What do people want from their lives? Through postal communication, people were contended with the messages they conveyed once a month. Today, with mobile phones, we are addicted to communicate every minute. We are losing the patience to wait for some time to communicate. We are increasing the anxiety to receive phone calls or mails. We are not concentrating on ourselves. Our focus, time and energy are being misused for various practices. At the end of our lives, if we turn back to see what we have achieved, we see that we have lost our entire life to achieve something, which does not give us the real happiness. What has happened with us?

We lost the discipline that our previous generations had. We lost patience. We lost respect for the older generation. We lost faith. We started questioning every act. Questioning is not wrong. I believe strongly that one can practice certain act only if he/she is totally convinced about what one is doing. One can attain such conviction only if he knows what and why he is doing. But the point here is that we are not interested to know about such practices, because we feel that we are much more matured than our previous generation people. We feel that we know more than what they knew and that we are more wiser than them. If so, are we much more happier than them? The answer is a simple 'NO'. Somebody can question me, Is Happiness quantifiable, comparable or tangible? I say NO. But happiness can be felt. One can judge whether the other person is happy or not. Close your eyes, hold your heart and ask yourself "Am I happy?" Think about the reasons why you are not happy. Decide upon what makes you happy. By happiness I do not mean the materialistic happiness that one gets with money. I am talking about the true happiness, that even a peacock can be seen with, when it dances. Money has nothing to do with the real happiness. I know what I am telling and talking might be a bull shit for most of the people. But I am interested in those who really want to be happy. Because I want all the people to be happy. Imagine the world, with all the people being really happy. UTOPIA?